Doggone it.

[justice_is_blond]

It's the typical early Friday evening in the office - all the appointments have been seen to, the last of the current walk-ins left fifteen minutes ago, and it's just Anders and his receptionist left at the front.

"As soon as you're done with the paperwork from that one you can go," he says. They're a half-hour away from closing and from what he overheard between her and his intern, she's got a second date planned tonight. He... does not. Somewhat the opposite, really. A microwave lasagna and hanging out with his cat while watching Netflix in his apartment above the office are his exciting plans.

"Are you sure?" Lirene asks, but there's no real intent behind the question. She'd prefer to take off early and he can't blame her. Anders waves her out and she's gone in a few moments, leaving the office feeling large and lonely. There aren't even any boarders tonight.

"Oh well," he says to the empty waiting room before grabbing the broom and starting to clean up. There's work to be done and it's not going to do itself. Unfortunately.

Comments

[justice_is_blond]

"Yes!" He pumps his fist in triumph as he lines the page up with the file. The date is right, everything lines up, and he knows how many people are angry at Lady Esterly.

"The city is angry about the state of the roads, and she's been hated since her rant about people all wanting to leech off of her. This is exactly what we need." It's perfect. He leans over to kiss Nate on the cheek before grinning and adding another at the corner of Nate's mouth. "I can put this online first thing tomorrow and we can watch the fallout happen. Maker, this could directly effect the voting session coming up."

[pinprick]

Awww, a cheek-kiss! Nathaniel beams, then finds more kisses leading toward his mouth. Maker, he loves that this man gets turned on by justice.

"The lords of like mind in the Landsmeet will put some distance between her and them, when they see the outrage," he purrs before landing a soft kiss on Anders' lips. "We've done it." Another kiss.

[justice_is_blond]

He chuckles as he gets another kiss, setting the papers down and leaning in to kiss back.

"We could say we've done enough for the night, work-wise. We could relax a little. Unwind. We apparently have champagne... or enjoy whatever you're in the mood for. Which I hope involves me, because I'm in the mood for you." Anders starts undoing the buttons of Nate's shirt, smiling mischievously.

[pinprick]

Sweet Maker, this man is his undoing. A kiss, and another kiss. Intoxicating, these lips. The scratch of stubble against his face, the silk of his hair, the softness of his mouth, some hazy drug-phase of hardness and sweetness that has Nathaniel willing to abandon everything for sex. And for love. Don't let him slip that last word in conversation.

The kiss breaks like glass. There's an inhale.

"Um." A swallow. A gulp, even. "We might have done enough for the night, theoretically. But, um, we could do even more. Esterly has her compatriots. Her clique, as it were. We could investigate the others a bit, implicate them in this. It wouldn't take much. Every Arl seems to think there's a clear line when it's really a spectrum."

A shallower kiss, before Nathaniel reels back and tries to cool down. There is an agenda, and there is Anders. Sabotage and Anders are not the same. Nathaniel wants to bring his own, without exploiting or being exploited.

[justice_is_blond]

It's all exhilarating to Anders. He's rarely done things technically alone, there are plenty of dissatisfied people who will gladly sign up for demonstrations, but he's never worked with someone like this. Now he feels like he gets everything all at once, someone he likes so much already and help in the fight. Keeping calm and focused is difficult like this, which is belied by the way his gaze lingers on Nate's lips when the man pulls back.

"We could. We even should, I suppose. Behaving, and all that." Now he meets Nate's eyes, gaze still very warm as he plays with an unbuttoned button. "Tell me about her closest compatriots. I'm not entirely up to date on the alliances in the Landsmeet." Though there's an alliance he'd clearly like to make. "We can take their tax returns and see if there's connections, or even if there aren't we can find something else. The corrupt always have things that will turn up with a bit of looking."

[pinprick]

Nathaniel smiles and turns back to the papers, but it doesn’t take long before he flings them to the coffee table and seizes Anders in a passionate kiss. He gives up. He’s not going to get any work done with the sound of Anders’ gasps echoing in his ears. He offers no explanation or apology.

“Never mind,” is all he murmurs against warm lips as hands go to bury themselves in golden hair.

[justice_is_blond]

He laughs into the kiss, surprised but far from reluctant as he returns it. Nate's hands are in his hair and everything seems so much better.

"Mm," he says when the kiss breaks, fingers returning right back to their earlier task. The buttons are quickly undone before Anders is pushing Nate's shirt off his shoulders. Nathaniel is delicious, a sight he's quite certain he'll never get enough of. Gently he brushes his fingers down Nate's bare chest, exploring and lingering.

"I l-like this." The change of words is quick, perhaps quick enough that it'll be unnoticeable. Always he's felt things too fast, too intensely, and he doesn't want to scare Nathaniel off. He loves having Nate's attention on himself, Nathaniel's time spent with him, every single thing he can get.

"I've always done the charging and the leading, but I like following your lead. And I very much like you shirtless. With less clothes in general, really."

[pinprick]

Nathaniel kisses Anders' neck, a hand slipping in under his shirt and smoothing over his belly. "Mm. And I like leading you. And I very much like you on your face, being pounded into the couch cushions."

Which sounds very much like an idea he wants to bring to fruition right about now. Soon, once this oven is pre-heated and nice and hot. He pulls Anders' shirt over his head and captures a nipple between his lips, sucking and laving until it is rock-hard and he can move to the next.

[justice_is_blond]

The plan gets a moan of appreciation. If he made a song about his own favorite things, being pounded by Nate, Nate's hands, and Nate's mouth would all feature heavily. It'd be quite the obscene song, really.

Anders hums the first few notes of the tune before breaking off with a gasp from a rather good application of his lover's tongue.

"You make the best plans," he groans, threading fingers through Nate's hair and tugging lightly. His other hand rakes down his lover's back, fingernails leaving light red lines that swiftly fade away. He loves this strong back, he thinks and actively works not to say, these glorious hands, this treasure of a man.

Reaching between them, Anders fumbles for the fastening of Nate's pants and misses, more than contenting himself with palming the man's groin and feeling his partner waking up.

[pinprick]

And his partner wakes up quickly. Unfortunately, so does his cell phone, buzzing from the end table he has it on. Nate has to break away from the second nipple with a sigh, reaching for the phone, glancing at the name, and rejecting the call. It's just Delilah, probably wondering where he is. They speak often enough and it's rarely urgent. For good measure, he shuts off the phone entirely. Now where was he?

Oh. Right.

He seizes Anders' hips and flips him over, unbuttoning his pants and dragging them down over his hips. Now, to kiss a line down that elegant spine.

[justice_is_blond]

While not a great actor, Anders nonetheless hides what disappointment he feels when Nate's phone goes off - a track that's made all the easier by how quickly attention is returned to him. He laughs, full on, as he's manhandled and stripped, and wiggles his ass.

"Like what you see? I know it's quite the view." Not like Nate can see a great deal when painting Anders with heated kisses. "You're quite the view yourself." Not that he minds not being able to see. Rather, he likes this anticipation, not knowing what Nate will touch or lick or probe next. He's spent so much time fighting for control over his own life and yet he he finds so much joy in handing it over.

"And quite the lover, and kisser." And he's quite the talker.

[pinprick]

"Mm," Nate says as if agreeing, or as if Anders' skin is absolutely delicious. Which it is. His tongue glides over his tailbone before swirling around a puckered entrance. Inside, Anders is silky and hot and tastes of musk. Fingertips may bruise his hips as he grips him, holds him in place to ravish him with his mouth. He likes to play Anders like an instrument that gives him moans, groans, and begging. All the sounds he makes are part of a symphony Nathaniel conducts.

"Only when I'm kissing you," he murmurs before going back to his work.

[justice_is_blond]

"Oh," he says, anything more complex swallowed whole by Nate's tongue. No previous partner had given this to him, and he can't imagine any giving it better even if they had. The teasing and probing have him groaning, forehead pressed into the pillow as if it alone can counter the trembling in his thighs from how good this is.

Heat pools low in his belly, spreading, and he groans again, spreading his legs in echo of that.

"Fffffuck," Anders manages. He can't think; he can only feel now. "Fuck, love, just, fuck."

[pinprick]

That word. That word.

Many people say that word during sex. Nate refuses to look too much into it, despite the eagerness he has when he hears it. The kiss breaks, though, and he pants for a few seconds before grappling for the lube. There it is; it warms in his hand, and he puddles it for a bit before going in and sliding two fingers deep inside Anders, kissing the base of his spine as he stretches him.

"You're so beautiful, darling," he rasps, voice thick with lust. "You flush and break gorgeously."

[justice_is_blond]

A whimper is Nate's answer as his fingers delve so nice and deeply into Anders, preparing him for more. He can hear how much Nate wants to be inside him and picture how the man looks right now, hard and eager.

"For you." He has no filter left and he can't bring himself to care as fingers twist and spread inside him, grazing the spot deep inside that he knows is about to get perfectly drilled. He's distantly aware of what he's saying and entirely meaning, and just as distantly aware of how he could likely say anything right now short of an outright declaration and things won't be taken as seriously as he feels them. It's far too soon.

"I want you inside me. I want all of you. You... please, Nate."

[pinprick]

Nathaniel can't resist it, the begging. He surges upward, slicking himself quickly and lining up. When the head of him breaches Anders, a deep groan wrenches from him, resonating in his chest. This man will be the death of him, he knows. Inch by inch, he loses himself. No telling where he ends and Anders begins. Once fully inside, he has Anders covered with his own body and begins to roll his hips, pounding, throbbing, searching for the pulse inside Anders' body.

[justice_is_blond]

His breathing becomes a mess of swear words and pleading, mixed with Nate's name tangled in there somewhere. The l word doesn't come again because now it feels like it might be too much, when they're merged and wrapped together intimately. It's too true. Too real.

Too much like if he says it now, everything will shatter.

So he thinks it with every thrust, with every beg for more as that spot is hit, I love you, don't leave me, I love you. He thinks it harder as he approaches his release, as his vision goes white-hot and he grabs the couch cushion and his knuckles go bloodless and he comes.

[pinprick]

Nathaniel spills inside him, wraps his arms around him, tucks his chin into the crook of Anders' neck like he can fully merge with him. Their breath combines. After a moment, he pulls out, urges Anders to turn over, and beams down at him. Their foreheads touch together. It's a risk, but the sex has him relaxed and feeling good, so he says it.

"I love you, too."

[justice_is_blond]

He freezes.

There isn't a chance he'd heard that right, he's gone delirious from the pleasure, or he'd blacked out, or something, anything, but there's no chance Nate means that even if Anders did hear what he thought he had. Maybe it's just the endorphins that come from a good lay. All Anders knows is that he can't really believe that he's hearing those words for the first time from a man he loves.

"Thank you." It's the wrong thing to say. He knows it the moment it's left his lips and he hastily shakes his head as time unfreezes and is suddenly going all too fast. "No, I mean, I mean, you, I, you." He needs to say it. Why is it so hard now? But he knows why. This could be real, and he's never had something work out. He doesn't want to lose this and he's scared. Terrified.

[pinprick]

Nathaniel's eyes widen briefly and he quickly rolls off Anders, sitting upright on the couch with brow furrowed. He was wrong. It was an impulsive word spoken in passion. He coughs and reaches for his phone to turn it on.

"Don't worry about it, I'm sorry. Um. Sorry." His cheeks flush.

[justice_is_blond]

The fear spikes and he reaches out, trying to take Nate's phone, trying to figure out how to speak past the panic knotting up his throat.

"No, please, stop. Please." His hands are shaking, he realizes, gaze focusing on them as he takes his lover's hands instead of the phone, holding them. It's so easy to express anger and outrage. This? It feels like he's running for his life and he doesn't know which direction is the right way to go.

"I love you," he manages. Nate had said the words already and yet Anders can't look up. "You have to, I've never..." He's never had someone love him back. He's never had someone love him, period. Foster families, lovers, people who fought alongside him, they'd never wanted him. How can someone who has everything, who is this amazing, possibly love Anders?

[pinprick]

The phone is snatched out of his hands, and the embarrassment evaporates. He finds himself interrupting Anders' confession with a kiss, passionate and impulsive. If this is hard for Anders to say, for whatever reason, then Nathaniel will make it so he doesn't have to say it at all.

His phone, now on, is buzzing again with Delilah's name on it. He doesn't even look.

[justice_is_blond]

He melts into the kiss. Despite his fumbling, Nate's not running away. He's staying here, kissing Anders, loving Anders, and the vet is the happiest he's ever been in his life. By the time the kiss breaks he's crying and hoping that doesn't get misinterpreted.

"My love," he says in a rough voice, feeling the words out. Anders wipes one of his cheeks and gazes at Nate, smiling with odd shyness considering how shamelessly he'd been spreading for the man just minutes earlier. "I'm sorry I'm a mess."

[pinprick]

Nathaniel shakes his head, feeling lighter than air. He cups Anders' face in his hands and wipes away a tear with his thumb.

"Don't you dare apologize," he says warmly. "There's nothing wrong with you." He leans in to kiss him. The phone stops buzzing as the call goes to voice mail, then starts up again. Delilah. Still.

"Give me a moment," he murmurs against his lips, reaching to pluck the phone out of Anders' hands. If she's calling nonstop, it might be urgent. He picks up the call and stands.

"Not a good time, 'Li," he says immediately, then stop to listen as she speaks. After a moment, his brow furrows. "With a friend. What's this about?"

Seconds pass. His face goes blank, and he sits back down, all the joy of the moment gone.

[justice_is_blond]

Nothing wrong with him. He's not so sure, considering so much of his life, but what matters is that Nate believes that. Even just being called a friend can't truly crush the floating feeling he's riding, though the way Nate sits after starts to shrink it down.

Anders wraps himself around Nate, searching his blank face. "Are you all right? What's gone wrong?" Li is Delilah, he knows that much after these months, but what might be happening is beyond him.